I find myself awake again.
It’s the third night in a row of
sleep suddenly tossed off like a blanket when too warm. I lift my head to see
the clock. It stares back at me in slow motion. The minutes lolligag, taking
their time as if they hadn’t a care in the world.
There is a silence in the house and
it shook me awake.
Oh, there is the familiar sound of
the air conditioner, the friendly creak of the house. Yes, I mustn't forget the
hum of the new overhead fan, whose breeze came at a great cost to my handyman
pride earlier in the week when I almost installed it correctly.
There is a silence in the house and
it’s loud.
Ruby and I knew this would happen.
We knew the day we brought him home from the hospital. We knew the day we
dedicated him to the Lord. We knew the days when we grounded him, when we had
the “come to Jesus” talk, the day when we saw a heart overwhelmed by
compassion. We knew that this day would come as we corrected, instructed,
coached, affirmed, encouraged and enjoyed our son. We knew someday that he
would be gone from his room, this house. He is not here, he is asleep
(hopefully by this hour) in another room, away at college.
I am awake and I am afraid. My mind
races (unlike the clock), what have we missed, is he ok? Will he remember what
we taught him, will he follow Christ, will he be wise…will he study?
In the deafening silence of the
house I am reminded:
Be still and know that I am God.
Psalm 46:10
Do not be anxious about anything,
but in every situation by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your
requests to God. Philippians 4:6
Do not worry about your life, says
Jesus, who of you by worrying can add a single hour to your life? Luke 12:22-29
There is a silence in the house and
I am quiet.
These scriptures collectively speak
of the Lord, “I am good and you can trust me no matter what”. I whisper back, “I
believe you and I will trust you.”
There is a silence in the house and
all is well for sleep has returned til the morning.
May you be encouraged this week if
you find yourself awake in the silence.
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